I love being able to experience things for the first time with Dima! Last night our church had a Trunk-or-Treat so the children could walk around safely to receive candy from cars. Dima was so excited to get dressed up in his Scream costume. He had a fun time receiving candy. Unfortunately, he couldn't stay long as he had homework to finish. He was a good sport and didn't make a fuss about leaving. He worked hard on his homework considering he was on a sugar high!
Last night we actually had some extra time before his Math tutor came over to carve some pumpkins. I didn't know if he would want to do it, but was surprised at how excited he got when I brought the pumpkins in from outside. I didn't say anything and he asked "Are we going to carve the pumpkins???". I loved the look on his face when I said yes!!
We had a blast drawing and carving out the faces. I forgot how dangerous carving pumpkins can be, I was just praying one of us didn't end up in the ER needing stitches! When we were preparing the pumpkins, we saved the seeds so we could roast them later. He asked if we could watch a scary movie and eat the seeds tomorrow. He is bound and determined to watch a scary movie, I on the other hand get freaked out watching them. I will try to talk him into watching one that is not too scary!
We sat the pumpkins outside and put candles in them for Trick-or-Treat night. We never get kids to come by our neighborhood because there aren't many kids that live on our road, but at least it looked cool!
Saturday is Dima's last cross country meet. Sounds like we may get some snow so it will be interesting! Dima actually said to me that he is looking forward to having a break and more time for homework. He is so burnt out from having no time to relax during the school week. I am so proud of him pushing through his homework the last few months when I know he was exhausted after concentrating in school and then cross country practice. I couldn't imagine going to another country and having to learn the language AND trying to keep up with the other students in class!
Thanks for reading!
Tina
Friday, October 28, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
Patience
I feel like a broken record when I take a deep breath in and say to myself to be patient. Last few days feels like every breath in I am saying this! I feel it is important to blog not only about the good times, but the not so good times. I have heard that adoption is not easy, but I am sure being a parent in general is not always easy. We felt we were called to adopt Dima and will continue to follow what God directs us to do. We understood that this would not be easy and feel that our marriage was able to handle the good and bad times. I am so thankful for the bond my husband and I share as I couldn't imagine going through this without it.
We are extremely blessed to have adopted such a special boy. He is smart, caring and so much fun to be around. That is why we get so frustrated when we see a small part of him showing lack of respect and putting up a wall when things do not go his way. This has been a constant battle for all of us and has been very stressful at times. We are thankful for most of the days where this attitude does not come out. We understand it could be a lot worse and are extremely thankful for this. We pray that this attitude will happen less and less and for the time being God shows us the way and patience.
I can only imagine what is going through his mind. After 14 years living in a certain environment where you only had your friends to support you and no parents to help guide you. You always had to rely on only yourself. I am sure it is hard for him now to allow us and others to help him. He fights any help from others. My only guess is that he may see it as a weakness, when we see it as a way to give someone help that has so much potential! Ukrainians typically do not show their emotions and are very independent. That is hard for us to understand and break down this wall around him that has been there for so long.
All we can do is pray for guidence and patience. Thanks for reading.
We are extremely blessed to have adopted such a special boy. He is smart, caring and so much fun to be around. That is why we get so frustrated when we see a small part of him showing lack of respect and putting up a wall when things do not go his way. This has been a constant battle for all of us and has been very stressful at times. We are thankful for most of the days where this attitude does not come out. We understand it could be a lot worse and are extremely thankful for this. We pray that this attitude will happen less and less and for the time being God shows us the way and patience.
I can only imagine what is going through his mind. After 14 years living in a certain environment where you only had your friends to support you and no parents to help guide you. You always had to rely on only yourself. I am sure it is hard for him now to allow us and others to help him. He fights any help from others. My only guess is that he may see it as a weakness, when we see it as a way to give someone help that has so much potential! Ukrainians typically do not show their emotions and are very independent. That is hard for us to understand and break down this wall around him that has been there for so long.
All we can do is pray for guidence and patience. Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Latest Post
I have no idea where the time has gone since the last blog? This last month has been extremely busy with school and cross country. Cross country will be coming to an end soon as I think Dima is ready for a little break. Homework takes up all of our evening time and I think he is getting burnt out a little. One evening he said all I do is go to school, go to practice, eat and do homework until bed! Eventhough he has been tired, he has been a real trooper and trying his best to do all his work. Some things he wants to finish like all the other students, however, there are still things that are too challenging for him to complete. Other students can get most of their work finished in class where he will do what he can and bring the rest home for us to help him. We are so thankful he has come to trust us helping him as last year it was a struggle at times. This is also a great way for us to see what he can and cannot do.
Last night was Parent-Teacher Conferences as we had the opportunity to see how he is doing in class. We are so blessed that he has such caring and helpful teachers. Since Dima is so quiet and shy, they all had a hard time finding out what he could and could not do. They all say he is slowly opening up which have helped to learn more about him. For the most part, the teachers say he has been respectful, however, a few times he has shown his attitude when he doesn't understand something or it was discovered that he didn't complete work. Luckily, that attitude is starting to diminish with him being able to understand more. For 14 years that was his way of dealing with problems, so it's not going to go away in a flash. Now that the teachers have a better understanding of him, I think that attitude will slowly go away. He is even starting to open up to his ESL teacher, finally!!! We have been trying to explain how important she is to him and how she can help him.
The other day Dusty and I were looking through some old pictures and were quickly reminded how far Dima has come in just 10 months!! This time last year Dima was waiting for us to come adopt him, now he has such a completely different life now. Before he didn't care about school, now he starts on his homework without us asking him to do it. Looking through his old pictures, we saw a child with no smile or hope, now all he does is smile!!
Last night was Parent-Teacher Conferences as we had the opportunity to see how he is doing in class. We are so blessed that he has such caring and helpful teachers. Since Dima is so quiet and shy, they all had a hard time finding out what he could and could not do. They all say he is slowly opening up which have helped to learn more about him. For the most part, the teachers say he has been respectful, however, a few times he has shown his attitude when he doesn't understand something or it was discovered that he didn't complete work. Luckily, that attitude is starting to diminish with him being able to understand more. For 14 years that was his way of dealing with problems, so it's not going to go away in a flash. Now that the teachers have a better understanding of him, I think that attitude will slowly go away. He is even starting to open up to his ESL teacher, finally!!! We have been trying to explain how important she is to him and how she can help him.
The other day Dusty and I were looking through some old pictures and were quickly reminded how far Dima has come in just 10 months!! This time last year Dima was waiting for us to come adopt him, now he has such a completely different life now. Before he didn't care about school, now he starts on his homework without us asking him to do it. Looking through his old pictures, we saw a child with no smile or hope, now all he does is smile!!
This was the first time we saw Dima in Ukraine since the summer hosting program.
This is the smile we LOVE to see!!! This is after he received his Citizenship Certification. In his mind, he was finally an American and had the certificate to prove it.
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